The Pointless Rankings are here. Every Monday, we will check on 10 things in the NBA (okay, not really) and rank them from best to worst as we see fit. Don’t take them TOO seriously. They are pretty pointless, after all, right?
1) San Antonio Spurs Have So Much Momentum: Hey, they’ve won their last 11 games. And they’ve surged into the #2 seed. They are back from the dead.
But let’s face it; they never really died. The Spurs have been like this since boy bands were in vogue. Don’t forget that Kawhi Leonard wasn’t in top form for most of the season. So if you left them for dead, then I feel like you’ve only watched the NBA the last four years. They’ve made the playoffs 25 of the last 26 years. There is death, taxes, and the Spurs in the playoffs.
2) Stephen Curry Breaking His Own Three-Point Record: He’s at 281 and counting (record was 272). There is no such thing as a bad Stephen Curry three. No matter what position he’s in, he always seems to make it. He’d probably be the best Call of Duty player of all-time with his sniping skills. That 45-point performance against Portland is one for the ages.
He’s made 814 three-pointers in the last three seasons. That’s insanity.
4) Jimmy Butler’s Love For Taylor Swift: It is so adorable.
5) National Grilled Cheese Day: It really should be every day. But I hope you had a tasty National Grilled Cheese sandwich on Sunday. Also, Grilled Cheese is supposed to have its own… effects. You can Google that.
6) Rudy Gobert Salute: It’s a simple and tried-and-true celebration. But it works for Rudy. Check it again.
7) Paul George Returning: I am so mixed about this but, ultimately, I should be happy that he’s back. That’s all I got. Nice dunk.
8) The Knicks, Of Course: They’re so bad they would even score for you. Why are they not last this week? Because I love trainwrecks.
9) Drake’s Face After Madonna Kissed Him In Coachella: Life could be worse, Aubrey. You should be thanking her later.
10) Negative Reaction To Russell Westbrook’s 54-Point Game: Hey, what is wrong with you?
He went for 54-9-8! He had 8 assists! Of course, Russell tried to get people involved. But because they lost, you would look at this negatively? Remember when we said that it’s a bad game if you have more shots than points? He had 54 in 43 field goal attempts. He made 21 of them. That’s GOOD.
Is it because Westbrook took 43 shots? So what? If it’s within the context of the offense, it’s fine, right? Oh, boy. You took some shots away from Andre Roberson and, uh, Dion Waiters (who still got 16 shots). You want your best guy to shoot the shots. And if he’s scoring, then let him. There is always a pro and a con when it comes to individual and team effort. So what if he stopped shooting in the third? Then you’d criticize Russ for NOT SHOOTING ENOUGH.
And you’re looking at his field goal attempts when he had a damn good all-around game? You’re never happy. If you like women and you get Bar Refaeli handed to you in a silver platter, you still wouldn’t be happy because of some stupid reason. Like, “I can’t date you, Bar! You went to a Laker game!”